Torres.

Everyone, I give you my dog.

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This is Torres. He is recently retired from the United States Army. He and my boyfriend were a bomb-dog team together in Afghanistan in 2011. While on assignment with another handler, Torres started to show some back problems, and the Army decided he would get an early retirement (he is only 4).

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So they called us and we got to get him back since my boyfriend was his original handler. We are so honored to have the opportunity to have him in our family. He is such a wonderful boy.

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And he is a goofball. He has adjusted to retirement VERY well and is a spoiled, silly dog. We couldn’t be prouder to call him ours.

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Thank you to all the other service members out there! (Human and canine!)

“25 Before 25″ Update

Since coming back to my blog and re-reading my older posts, I realized that I have not thought about or updated my “25 before 25″ List in a long time. So here is where I stand on completing these 25 goals before I turn 25.

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“25 Before 25″
I am not one for New Years resolutions, so this year (2013) I decided to give myself 2 years to complete a “25 before 25″ list.

1. Run a half-marathon (I think I am re-thinking my ability to become a long-distance runner.  A good update for this would probably be “Run a 10k”)

2. Go to Costa Rica to work with Sea Turtles  Done!!

3. Go to Africa to work with the big cats (still hoping to do this! But I don’t know if I will have the funds before 2015)

4. Finish my undergraduate degree (Graduating in 2016)

5. Graduate with a 4.0 (or as close as possible) (Going to do this!)

6. Finish reading the 8 “for fun” Zoology books I bought recently (8/8)  Done!

7. Grow my  hair out long enough to donate to Locks for Love (Donating 9 inches to Pantene Beautiful Lengths July 2013)   Done!!

8. Try rock-climbing Done in Costa Rica!

9. Go to a new Zoo

10. Run a 5K in under 30 mins (Just getting back into running again after some surgery. I’ll get there!)

 11. Go Horseback Riding (DONE! In Costa Rica and VA last year)

12. Complete the Tough Mudder (and not injure myself) (July 2013) DONE!!

13. Finish the “100 push-ups” Challenge (Haha I think I got to about 10 and stopped)

14. Apply and get into Vet School (I have since changed my career goals, so I will no longer be applying to Vet school)

15. Get an internship at a Zoo (This is no longer an ambition of mine)

16. Go to an MSU football game (I hate football)

17. Get a professional massage

18. Donate blood

19. Tour a winery/ Wine tasting (March 2013 VA trip) DONE!!

20. Join a new club or group just because it sounds interesting

21. Go a whole semester without missing a class (Seriously, I know I can do this. Just have to work on staying healthy!)

22. Use my kayak at least 5 times DONE!!

23. Take my mom out for a girl’s day. DONE!!

24. Make a gift for a friend, just because DONE!!

25. Spend a day exploring a new city in my state (Brethren, MI and Manistee, MI: July 2013)  DONE!!

 

So out of my original 25 goals, I have completed 11, 4 no longer apply, and I have ten left to do. Not half bad I think. I still like the idea of completing all my “25 before 25″ goals, but if I don’t that’s ok too. I have realized in looking back at this list that your priorities can change quite a bit in 2 years.  I have some things that I would still like to do from this list and definitely some things I would like to add. We’ll see what happens though :)

I’m Back. (Again)

Hello all.

I am not sure what keeps bringing me back to this little blog. Maybe its just the appeal of having something with my name to it? Is it that I’m part of the so-called “selfie generation” and just have to broadcast my every thought and action on the internet for the whole World to see (Let’s be real though, theres probably only about 10 of you readng this)?

Maybe… Probably…

But whatever the reason, I keep being drawn back. I read through some of my old posts today and had a very hard time going through them. Its funny how the mind works sometimes, how it can make the hard parts fuzzy over time. How it dulls the pain as life moves on. I have been feeling healthy for a while now, mentally anyways. Dont get me wrong, I still have days where I can feel the dullness and sadness trying to creep back in, but I have learned how to deal with these feelings now and push through. But I am learning that it’s so easy to forget how bad it really was. When you are going through something like depression and anxiety it is so easy to feel like you’ll never be well again. That you’ll never be whole again. But then we start to heal and we begin to forget.

I am grateful at the turnaround in my health and well-being recently. But I also don’t want to forget the pain that has made me so strong. I dont want to dwell on it, but instead to take it in and learn from it. I am always afraid of a relapse, but I think by going back and remembering my warning signs I can learn from the pain and contnue to grow and he strong.

I can ony hope the same for everyone out there who had gone through or is going through depression or GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). I know that if I can make it to the other side that we all can. Even if its not always easy.

So I suppose that is what keeps bringing me back here. The reminder of where I have been and how strong I have become because of it. And I hope that anyone out there reading this will read my old posts and come back to this one and feel hope. Because you can get better. We all can, and we will.

Why Hello Again.

It has been months since I last looked at, posted on, or even thought about this little blog here. Many things have happened. I worked in Costa Rica for 5 weeks over the summer, moved 3 times, started 2 new jobs, quit both new jobs and now I am attempting to go back to school. And through all that I was thinking I was doing so much better. Off all my anti-depressants and anxiety meds! But then that switch flipped again and I’m back to struggling. It almost seems harder this time. Life is a daunting thing sometimes my friends. Making choices in a day that will affect the rest of your life. And without much of a support system, it can be downright terrifying. School is hard, finding a job that doesn’t cause me to have panic attacks in the bathroom is hard, and personal relationships are hard. I’m just waiting for something to get easier. But in the meantime I’m forging ahead, trying to make the best of it. Trying to make myself enjoy this process, this life. Sometimes all I want to do is lie down and sob. And sometimes I do. But other times is when that inner strength comes a knocking and says, “you can do this. You are strong”. And so I pick myself up for another day and hope for the best. I hope you are all doing well. Keep your chin up folks, its gotta get better.

Take me back here please. Paradise.